I know these kind of posts are rare these days, having gone the way of "x-thousand post" and "omg five years!" threads. But I have a thing for milestones, and I used to get so excited at the post-count and year milestones, and I used to promise myself that I would make one for every milestone that I encountered. I have most of them saved, as well as tons of roleplay threads (for hot BH nostalgia, log on to a
500 post thread after a comments wipe).
And this milestone obsession included goodbye threads: I swore I would never be one of those people that faded away; that my stay at Braggart's Hall would have a punctuation mark at the end. My OCD extends to an obsession with closure. So although part of me wants to stay and wait it out 'til the very end, as I find myself checking the boards less and less, and having finally ended my nearly six-year tenure as Voice Tomah, I figure it's time for said punctuation mark.
I don't really have anything left to say specifically; I think I have given out enough specific thank-yous in various threads over the years, I have made enough jokes, I have cited enough memories (see:
Reflections on Evernight from a few years back, which really sums up a lot of what I am saying in this post). I think here, at the end, I am left with just a general sense of gratitude for this place. I am a pretty successful person. I am at a great law school, and I'm going to be working at a pretty incredible place soon. I have moved from bumfuck Michigan across country to school, and I'll be moving back across country to work. I have lived over the Atlantic for months. And at each one of these places in my life, this community was with me: in a very real way, in the people that I met who welcomed me, from the first minibash in Lansing and Toledo to the ones in Edinburgh, to the ones who I fly to Mississippi to see and that drive up to Boston to see me.
It really just occurred to me: I came here when I was 14, and I'm now 23. I have literally grown up with you guys.
But more amazingly than even the people is that I internalized some stuff about this place that has made me a seriously better person. A compassion for people, gained from all the religious debates. An appreciation for beauty, if that's not too cheesy, which was inevitable in all the wonderful roleplay threads that I used to love and participate in. A joy and continual surprise at how
funny people can be, from the stupid spam threads, to the celebrity roleplays, to the earliest iParties. A continual amazement at how people can come together from all over the world.
And perhaps the most valuable trait: this place has given me a breathtaking streak of independence. I do not take shit from anyone anymore, and that is, to a great extent, because of this place, which taught me that I can stand up to anyone, that my views are worth defending, and that there is no one innately better than me (aided to no small extent that I think I was flamed after my very first post :]). I've went head to head with professors with whom I disagreed in front of classes, I did oral arguments in front of a pretty awful judge this summer, and I get into it pretty hardcore with people around here about politics, religion, and everything else, and I
always hold my ground. I wish that there was some way to show the person I was when I came to this place the person that I have become, because he wouldn't believe it. I don't know if I would have been the same person without having ended up here: I guess it's enough to say that I'm not sure, which is a troubling enough prospect in itself, and it makes me grateful that I don't have to worry about what
might have happened had I not caught a random link 8 years ago.
So much has happened here that it's impossible to compartmentalize, and as you can probably see from my packrattish, thread-saving nature, that sort of bothers me. As many threads as I save, I know that I have forgotten more memories from this community than I have retained. But when you've been milling around a place for eight years, maybe it's better that you just let the memories sort themselves out: see what sticks, see what fades, and see what only floats back up when you inevitably meet back up with your old friends down the road.
For those of you that have come to the end of my rambling -- both in this post and in a more general sense :) -- thanks. Bye, all, and God bless. I will miss you, and it's really only in writing this post that I realize how much I will miss this community: I treasure all my memories of it, and it has been an incalculable blessing to have stumbled upon this place so many years ago. Thanks for everything, and if you're ever looking for an old friend, I don't think I will be hard to track down; people still around here have seen me face to face even in recent months, and know how to get in touch. Just ask around :)
Take care of yourselves, and I hope we meet again down the road.
-Thyarr/Tomah/Brad